09 June 2010

I am homesick!

Ok, im almost crying. Sitting at my desk at work and trying hard to stop the tears from rolling out. Im not sure if these are 'happy tears' or 'sad tears'. Maybe a bit of both. All I can say is I miss my life in India. I am homesick. Terribly.
The thing that triggered the cry-baby inside me was a friend of mine sending me his wedding pics. This friend got married few days back in India, and I could not attend the wedding. But just seeing most of my other friends together enjoying, smiling, dancing (with such vigor that im sure the baraat horse must have turned red seeing the moves :P) sent pangs of nostalgia, which refuse to subside. Add to the fact that I miss my family, and I miss S, and I miss all those crazy people dancing in front of the baraat horse.
Its not that I haven't been to india in a long while. I payed a visit and squeezed in my shaadi during that visit just 3-4 months back. And I did meet all my friends (the very same who were dancing in front of the baraat horse) during my shaadi. But the very fact that I can afford (in time and money) just one visit a year to india, is pissing me off. And by every passing day, I feel happy about our decision of not "settling down" here in Amrika. I realise that I would be giving up the material comforts here, the clean air here, and that life in India is more physically draining than life here, but still having a life in india just "fits" in my mind. And I would like to tell the people who express shock, concern or amusement over the fact that I have voluntarily chosen to go back in the next couple of years, that I will be just fine :P . I have lived in my country for 22 years, and living here for just 4 years (or maybe 5 when i actually make the shift), will not require much adjustment to go back to living in India!! So please dont be surprised, it really pisses me off ;) .

8 comments:

Nightflier said...

can totally understand and relate with you!
nevertheless cheer up girl :)

pRasad said...

You are making right decision girl. Afterall, you won't get the warm & love of your near & dear ones there.

Welcome back in advance :)

Cartographer said...

All I can say is Wow!!

Cartographer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
~ Lopa said...

ohh i can almost relate to that nostalgia. Those are some part and parcels of life... there are compromises everywhere and it's up to us to chose which one they will be.

And you will be fine, I ams sure of that ! :)

Neha said...

@lopa: you are right..compromises that we end up choosing!!

shub said...

One of my friends has the same theory - when you've lived some place for 20 plus years, it can't be that hard to go back. But the transition still may not be the easy.
As for the homesickness...there's always the phone and Skype, if nothing else.

Devaki said...

Having recently made the move to India after 4 years in the US, I am totally with you. To be honest, I was skeptical to return for all the reasons you mention, but now that I am back, I can say life is good here too. And there's something about the feeling of being 'at home' that's priceless!